How to stop being an angry momma?
I’m going to teach you how not to be an angry momma
It might not be that easy for you to create a balance between your emotional state and your behaviour towards your kids.
That’s understood. It’s natural and it is very human.
But it is so important not to react in temper to your child’s temper and it is important to work consistently on your own emotional balance and understanding.
Try and understand how your child feels
For example, whenever you see your child getting highly emotional or melting down, don’t tell yourself you cannot handle this. Never react hastily or unthinkingly.
Instead, tell yourself, ‘He/she is just a child in great distress who needs understanding and guidance, not my anger on misbehaviour. So, I won’t react immaturity and reflect back negatively I will give them the security and support they need..’
Believe me, thinking rationally about how you usually react and how you are actually supposed to react can do wonders for your relationship with your child.
Here are some new habits you can take onboard instead:
Hey Angry Momma, Take a moment, and think
Things can become a blur when we feel emotional and our reactions are not always smart. When a child is whining, crying, pushing all the boundaries you may have heightened emotions yourself. Within the instant of the moment, you just feel like opening your anger upon them.
In such situations, take a moment and breathe slowly Count to 30 and literally just breathe, say and do nothing. This little break can do wonders and give you some space to think and reflect better!
Identify what triggers you
The very first step to overcome your own anger is to know the reason behind it. Before you burst with anger, try to gain an understanding of what actually triggers your anger. Most of the time you are actually not aware of what is making you angry. Usually, it is out of your own habitual reactions or behavioural patterns.
Set a routine
When you have certain structure your day, you have proper direction lying ahead of you. This helps both you and your kids stay calmer – knowing what is expected can be very reassuring
Always try to stay on the schedule and make sure they follow the same routine every day. Doing so is likely to make them more cooperative and less complaining.
Take a deep breath, and relax…
No, this is not the same pause we discussed earlier. Here we are talking about breathing practices and meditation. This is something that you actually need to implement in your daily routine so that it becomes a part of your habitual patterns.
Practising meditation with a disciplined approach, on a regular basis not just keeps you mentally healthy but also improves your emotional balance and rational decision making. Just imagine the drastic shift in your usual behaviour. This major change in your anger management can do wonders.
If you are an angry momma a lot and it is impacting on yours or your child’s emotional health do see a doctor so you can get some therapy for it.
Your child NEVER deserves your anger angry momma so time to change your ways.
You might want to consider e-counselling if you need a place to explore what makes you angry in more depth
Angry Momma is a guest post